


Infinity on high

by Join_The_Hunt



Series: Golden [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Office, Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Angst, Band Break Up, Beta Wanted, Child Neglect, Drug Addiction, Drugs, F/F, F/M, Famous Dean, Fluff, Heavy Drinking, Homophobia, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, M/M, Musician Dean, Musician Sam, Not Beta Read, Office Blow Jobs, Office Sex, Past Child Abuse, Past Drug Use, Rich Castiel, Singer Dean, Smut, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-15
Updated: 2015-03-30
Packaged: 2018-03-13 02:04:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3363683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Join_The_Hunt/pseuds/Join_The_Hunt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a photo is leaked of Dean unintentionally cheating on Castiel, it doesn't end well. Packing his things and leaving without a simple goodbye Castiel removes all traces of himself from Dean's life in the blink of an eye.</p><p>Dean looks back on the fond memories from how they met and the first year of their relationship to how they stuck together through thick and thin and how they supported one another in achieving their dreams step by step. In a roller coaster of heartbreak, young love and broken relationships they somehow made it through together.</p><p>So far an introductory two chapters have been posted, I am going to put my heart and soul into this over summer so it is on a mini break until then.</p><p>Currently un-Beta'd (currently looking for one)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hopefully this will work out how I have planned it up in my brain... 
> 
> Thank you for giving this fic a chance, I hope you will enjoy it and stick with it as it hopefully progresses. The next chapters will be much longer but this is just the introduction chapter so it is pretty short... Sorry about that.
> 
> (I am British so there may be British phrases or words)
> 
> Please go forth and enjoy chapter 1 of part 1!

_**August 2014** _

 

"Cas! Talk to me! What the fuck's gotten in you?" Dean had to duck as another book was thrown towards him narrowly missing his head and hitting the wall behind with a hard slap adding to the growing collection piled behind him. He came home an hour ago to find Castiel packing his things a look of pure hatred on his face, Dean had tried repeatedly to ask what was wrong but that only ended with Castiel throwing hard back books at him. "Seriously Cas! What the fuck have I done, you didn't want me to leave last week and now you can't even stand to look at me! I don't understand what I've done to piss you off so much!" Dean gently wrapped his hands around Castiel's biceps in a pitiful attempt to calm his boyfriend down, in the same moment Castiel's head snapped around, he met Dean's gaze, his eyes puffed with tears but there was no sadness in the blue orbs just anger and hatred engulfing his boyfriend.

Castiel shoved his way through Dean's grip a bag containing his possessions, which he kept at Dean's house, in each hand. Dean followed his boyfriend to the door pleading for him to explain what was happening the entire way, if he touched Castiel an icy glare was thrown at him; Dean couldn't stop the tears from falling from his eyes. What would his dad say, men weren't supposed to cry, men weren't supposed to fuck other men either but Dean loved Castiel and his father's views weren't going to stop him any time soon, so if crying made him less of a man then so be it.

Upon reaching the front door Dean surged forwards, snatching a bag from Castiel's hand in an effort to stop the man.

"Give it back to me now Dean." Castiel didn't look at Dean, his eye's stayed looking toward the door; Dean clutched at the bag; Castiel's deep voice wavered as he spoke.

"Cas... Please-" Dean choked on tears as he spoke.

"No." And then he was gone, the door slammed behind Castiel rattling picture frames through the hallway and then everything was silent. Dean stood in shock; Castiel's bag still clutched in his shaking hands. When Dean's leg's buckled from underneath him he fell painfully onto the wooden stairs, his whole body shaking, breathing heavy and erratic.

Dean sat on the stairs on the verge of a panic attack for an hour before he moved, obviously Castiel wasn't coming back; he packed his bags and practically ran out the door not giving Dean a single explanation or even a side glance. He glanced down at the full duffel bag still held tightly in his grip, contemplating for a moment before he decided to open the bag; he pulled the zip across, the teeth clicking apart breaking the silence of the house. The bag was a mess, clothes screwed into untidy clumps in the corners; books creating jagged edges on the bag, everything Castiel personally owned in Dean's house was thrown in the bag two bags. At the bottom laid Castiel's new iPad the screen was cracked but it still worked as Dean swiped the screen across the password was no trouble as Dean set it, however when the screen burst into life the iPad still had working applications but that wasn't what caught his breath, no it was the obviously sneaked picture of himself at a club with a dark hard girl sat in his lap, tongue down his throat and hand in his pants.

"No no no no!" Dean vaguely remembers the event, he was drunk and slightly high after his gig, everything had been going so well, the tour was the best one yet but then that girl came onto him and he didn't have the ability to coordinate his limbs enough to remove her from the position she had taken writhing in his lap, eventually Benny had pulled her away before she moved her mouth down to his pants but not soon enough, the paparazzi had already gotten the shot of 'Dean Winchester cheating on his boyfriend' with a groupie slut and published it the next day.

Dean's heavy heart sunk further; Castiel had seen the picture, he had seen Dean cheating on him but he hadn't even let his boyfriend explain the situation. He needed to ring Castiel at least and beg for forgiveness, he hadn't gotten high or even touched a drop of alcohol since the incident but right now his bottles of whiskey under the counter were starting to seem extremely inviting. He dug through his cluttered pockets looking for his phone, he had it last night in the club but now it was gone; Dean never put his phone in his duffel, there was too much hassle getting it out again... So where was it?

He checked every nook and cranny in his car, the phone was nowhere to be found. "Fucking great!" Sure Dean could borrow Sam's phone or use the land line if he knew Castiel's number but the guy just got a new phone and Dean was the only one who had his number at the minute, maybe Sam had it too?

When he re-entered the house he slumped back onto the stairs staring intently at the door refusing to move until Castiel came home. The itch started then, just under his skin the want for the drugs he had desperately needed in order to calm down his nerves but he couldn't go back on the promises he made to himself, he needed to call Sam; Sammy can help. Just as he was about to heave his body from the stairs something caught his eye, it was Castiel's phone, the corner of the blue case poked out from the untidily piled shoe collection by the door, he jogged over to the phone, surely enough the screen was shattered it had obviously hit the wall at speed, just like the iPad it still worked thankfully.

Dean cursed under his breath at the glass on the screen catching his thumb, he could call Sammy; he could help. The phone struggled into life and immediately opened Castiel's recent messages, Dean's message thread was the most recent but there were messages sent over night hours ago, Dean was either driving home then or sleeping, he hadn't touched his phone all night. He scrolled up seeing a collection of messages supposedly sent from himself to Castiel

**Dean W**

**Received 1:03am**

**Having such a great time Cas!**

**Received 1:30am**

**I have a surprise for you Cas!**

**Received 2:48am**

**Can't wait to see your face when you see it!**

**Received 4:18am**

**Check this Cas.**

A picture of Dean with the girl straddling him was attached under the message, Dean's hands started to shake, someone had his phone; this wasn't him sending the messages.

**Sent 4:30am**

**WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!**

**Received 4:35am**

**You should learn to blow like her Cas, best night ever!**

**Sent 4:37am**

**WHAT!?**

**Received 4:40am**

**She swallows Cas, deep throats too. God damn I'm getting hard just thinking about it.**

**Sent 4:45am**

**EXCUSE ME? HOW MUCH CRACK DO YOU HAVE IN YOUR FUCKING SYSTEM THAT MAKES YOU THINK THIS IS IN ANYWAY AN APPROPRIATE TEXT TO SEND YOUR BOYFRIEND?!**

**Received 4:48am**

**Enough to know I never loved you.**

The phone fell from Dean's hands; Castiel thinks he never loved him; he was head over heels the first time he kissed Castiel they had been together for almost four years if the state allowed them to get married they would both have rings on their fingers now, how could he even think that.

Dean fell to the floor, head falling back hard against the wall, not that he cared it's his own damn fault this all happened. He gently picked the broken phone from the floor and dialed Sam's number thankfully it was in the contacts. When he finally answered Sam was breathless and struggling to string together coherent sentences.

 _"Guess Dean didn't tell you Cas but we have a whole one day leave each other alone thing going on and you called at a really bad time..."_ Dean tried his best to ignore the unwelcome image Sam's post sex voice was currently painting in his head and let out a shaky whimper.

"Sammy..."

 _"Dean? Shit Dean what's going on?"_ Rustling and Jessica's unhappy huff sounded in the background as Sam moved to a different room.

"Sammy its Cas he uh... he-" Speaking and drawing in shaky half breaths wasn't working, Dean could feel his chest tighten further with every breath.

_"Dean breathe. Calm yourself down a bit then tell me."_

"He's gone Sam. Packed his things, threw books and left. I fucked it up Sammy, the best thing that's ever happened to me and I fucked it up!"

_"Dean what happened? Why did he just leave?"_

"It's all my fault Sammy-"

_"Dean stop, do you need me to come over?"_

"I'm sorry Sammy-"

 _"Okay give me twenty minutes. Don't do anything stupid just wait there."_ Sam hung up as Dean drew his legs up to his chest; his head fell into his arms as he cried.

He didn't know how long he had been sat on the floor but he jolted his head up as the front door swung open hope filled his eyes as he let his thoughts wonder to the hope of it being Castiel, he let out a disappointed sob as Sam rushed inside and the door slowly clicked closed behind him.

"Shit Dean, what happened?" Fresh tears bloomed in Dean's eyes as Sam pulled him into a hug.

"'m sorry Sammy I just couldn't-"

"No Dean you are my brother, I don't care. Come on lets go get you something to drink and calm you down then you can tell me what happened" Sam pulled Dean up off the floor with practiced ease and helped him stumble towards the kitchen. This day was supposed to be great, the band's latest album was topping charts and the tour was amazing but then everything went to shit when Dean got to drunk.

"All my fault Sammy."

"I'm not gunna agree or disagree until I know what happened alright?" Sam dropped Dean down on a stool placed neatly by the counter and darted around, grabbing Dean a glass of water and a towel to dry his face and then promptly dropped down in front of his brother.

"So... What's going on Dean?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so this is a repost of this chapter, there were a couple mistakes that i have corrected, hopefully there aren't any more that I have missed but due to not having a Beta it is a tough task.
> 
> I promise the next chapters will be much longer than the first two, they were kind of just tester chapters.
> 
> please enjoy :3

**_September 2010_ **

 

"Hey you must be Zeke. This is Benny, my brother Sam and I'm Dean. It's great to finally meet you man." Dean extended his right hand to the man before him; Dean's hand was quickly grasped in the firm shake with the other man, his heavily tattooed arms flexing under the movement.

"Hello Dean, Sam, Benny." Zeke shook each of their hands as he greeted them, everything about the man's appearance screamed drummer; his muscled arms covered in tattoos which Dean undoubtedly knew continued across his chest and back covering his torso in colored ink. "I trust you haven't made your decision yet?"

"No man, so far no one has really had that spark with us, you know what I mean..? Oh take a seat by the way." Dean directed Zeke to the couch opposite the one he and his fellow band mates had been sat on for the majority of their day. Once Zeke was settled Dean spoke up, being the lead singer automatically nominated him to be the bands spokesman apparently. "So what makes you right for the position of our drummer?"

**_October 2010_ **

Zeke had been the drummer for a month now, it was safe to say he was the right choice; he was popular with the small fan base the band currently had and he had the chemistry with the other band mates making onlookers think he had know the other three from birth. The band had played three gigs so far with their new drummer and Dean was more than thankful he no longer had to play drums as well as sing because that was just a sound technician's nightmare. They mostly stuck to playing at the roadhouse but occasionally opportunities would arise from other bars and clubs needing some live entertainment. The boys had noticed a large number of teenage girls wanting photos and dancing to their music, sure they were all well built men in their twenties, Sammy only just, but Dean couldn't help but cringe when said teenagers wearing way too much make up and horribly revealing clothing tried flirting their way into his pants or the pants of his fellow band mates.

The band's next gig was a week away meaning Dean was enjoying a night off from practice, they had deemed the Friday a week before any gig a time to get plastered and blow off steam before a week of practicing every night after each member finished work. Although he had a night off practice that didn't mean he could relax, rent was due at the end of the month and with all the new equipment, including a new guitar for Dean as he was no longer playing drums, money was tight and every cent he could pick up from the roadhouse was welcome. Working at the Roadhouse wasn't too bad, Dean had known Ellen since he was a kid so she was more than happy to give the twenty four year old a job when things weren't going to well, she never complained about him missing busy nights to play gigs or practice; it was the drunks that he didn't like. Many patrons would come in on a Friday night and demand beer after beer until they couldn't form the words any more, then Dean was calling a cab and carrying them out the back door before they threw up on any of the college kids looking for a good night out with friends.

Dean tapped his palm against the top of the cab to signal to the driver it was time to get the latest drunk bastard home, a guy Dean had decided to personally name 'Homophobic Hugh', every Friday night he was sat at the bar spitting up rubbish about what it was like when he was young, he would spit homophobic slurs at those who 'committed a homosexual sin' in his presence and complain about 'the shitty service' when Jo was on her break and Dean was left to man the bar by himself; struggling to keep up with orders of food and drink.

"You take a break now Dean, you been going for hours, don't want you exhausting yourself and passing out on us now." Ellen's motherly voice broke him from his thoughts; he rubbed a hand through his sandy brown hair and let out a deep sigh into the cold clear night.

"You sure Ellen? Don't want Jo left alone with those perverts-"

"Dean Winchester, you and I both know Joanna Beth is more than capable of handling herself now take a break or I will lock you out!"

"You know I'll just pick the lock and get back in." Dean flashed a cheeky grin as he rustled in his many pockets. When he reached the door way Ellen's arm blocked his pathway.

"I mean it Dean!"

"Hey I just need my smokes, and _then_ I will have a break." And as if she read his mind, Ellen's hand was stretched towards his chest, half empty packet of cigarettes sitting quietly in her palm.

"These things are gunna kill you."

"We all die someday; I'm just gunna die sooner." Ellen let out an irritated huff as Dean grabbed his lighter from his jacket and lit up the cigarette currently dangling from his lips.

"I don't expect to see you behind that bar for at least half an hour." And then she was gone. Dean let his body fall back against the building as a trail of warm grey smoke rose from his lips, the silence soon consumed him; he closed his eyes and started to hum. It wasn't anything special just one of the songs he had written whilst mucking around on Ellen's old piano she kept in the basement, every so often he would take a drag from the cigarette and slowly exhale the smoke before resuming the song.

He was jolted from his dazed state when a body ran into him; he cursed as he lost his footing and stumbled sideways.

"The fuck?" Dean was struggling to work his way out of his dazed state, he looked around until his eyes fell on a man small than him in height with dark unruly hair and bright eyes that caught the night's darkened light in all the right ways.

"I am so terribly sorry; I didn't see you there. Are you alright?" The man seemed to panic, as Dean stomped out the fallen cigarette and straightened his back.

"Don't sweat it man, happens to the best of us." The man shuffled from foot to foot clearly unsure of what to do next. "Dean by the way, Dean Winchester." Dean held his hand out in a greeting, a pitiful attempt to make the guy seem less stressed by the situation.

"Oh, um Castiel... Castiel Novak." Dean gave the man's sweaty hand a firm shake whilst looking him up and down, he was dressed in black slacks with a white button down shirt tucked in neatly, despite the top two buttons being undone and the absence of a tie it looked as if the guy had come straight from the office.

"Strange name dude."

"Strange parents." The guy seemed to visibly relax as he leaned against the building next to Dean who had now lit up another cigarette and proceeded to offer one to Castiel who graciously accepted.

"Touché. So what's got you running out o' there so quick?" What was wrong with a bit of healthy conversation?

"My brother. He thinks it is appropriate to chat up the bar staff and then deem it appropriate to find a 'fuck buddy' for me, as he so graciously put it." Dean struggled to hold back the snigger at yet another guy trying to get into Jo's pants.

"Oh Cas, rule number one of the Roadhouse: You don't try and chat up Jo. I have seen many try and just as many fail in that department." Dean exhaled a thin spindle of smoke as he paused to look at Castiel. "So what's your brother trying to find you some one for? A good looking guy like you got no one waiting for him at home?"

"A severe lack of gay men in this town. And of those few, even less willing to put up with my mother."

"Oh... What's so bad about your mother?"

"Well besides the fact she is horribly religious and doesn't know I like dick? She sees homosexuality as a sin, and that the accuser will be dealt a one way ticket to hell. Other than that I am itching to take a guy home and introduce him as my boyfriend." Castiel let out a sigh with a plume of smoke being forced from his lungs. "What about you? Handsome guy like you surely you have a nice girl waiting at home?"

"Nah sorry man, no one wants to stick around with a no good barman wanting to be a musician. It's usually quick fuck and then goodbye no names given."

"You're a musician?"

"Yeah my brother and I have a band with a couple friends. Pretty lame really-"

"I doubt it Dean, music is a talent. I highly regard anyone that possesses such a talent."

"That's real nice o' you Cas... So what do you do? Slacks, button down, shiny shoes; you a detective or something fancy like that?" Castiel let out a small snigger.

"No, well I'm not a detective I work for my family's business; Novak and Son's retail. I can't stand it, every day its one posh bitch after another wanting 'only the finest in luxury accommodation'." Dean couldn't help the laugh escaping his lips along with a slither of smoke as Castiel imitated a posh woman's voice to punctuate his hatred for his workplace.

"Sounds rough man, don't know how you do it. I would probably turn around and slap 'em; there was a time when I was glad just to have a roof over my head."

"I do try to offload as much as I can onto the others, I don't want to be there so I don't see the point in the effort. I much prefer sitting in my office typing numbers and avoiding as many stuck up customers as I can. My mother won't fire me, she could walk in on me watching porn and not even bat an eyelash, well as long as it wasn't any men sucking other men off, I am after all her 'star son', makes me sick. Anyway, all this talk of work is exactly what I came here tonight to avoid." The men stood in comfortable silence after that, the only sounds being the release of air from their lungs as they blew out spindles of cigarette smoke.

"Dean I know I said at least half an hour but you need to come back an' work at some point, it's starting to get busy and Jo is getting ready to slap some of 'em in there." Ellen's head poked through the threshold of the door as she raised her eyebrows, Dean looked down at his phone and was shocked to see he had been out the back of the Roadhouse for almost forty minutes.

"Oh shit sorry Ellen, I'll be right in." Ellen gave him an approving nod before retreating back inside, Dean turned to Castiel an apologetic look in his eyes. "Sorry Cas gotta go but it was great talking to you; you should come around again at some point."

"I look forward to it Dean."

"Awesome!" Dean hopped back inside the building, discarding his jacket on a disused crate next to the now closed door. He ungraciously rubbed a hand through his hair as he walked back out to behind the bar; Jo gave him an evil look as he noticed significantly more people at the bar than there was previously. "Not my fault Jo, Ellen _insisted_ I have a break." She threw a towel towards him and he quickly got to work on taking orders.

From that Friday onwards Castiel came to the Roadhouse every week, there was always a shorter man accompanying him, Dean could only assume it was Castiel's unnamed brother as many times he had seen the smaller companion pointing at men around the bar and wiggling his eye brows. Dean had never once seen the dark haired man leave or even approach any of the men, he sat and looked around the bar, obviously blanking out his overly talkative brother.

 

**_October 2010_ **

****

"So Dean, I have been meaning to ask you a question." Dean was silently thanking the gods of fate that the Roadhouse was quiet that night, with the stress of the album and drunk patrons he would surely have cracked.

"What now Jo?"

"Okay, do you know the detective guy that comes in every Friday? Dark hair, blue eyes, dressed to impress-"

"Yeah and he ain't a detective Jo, works in retail or something like that... Why?" If Jo was going to tell him she had been eying up the suited man then Dean wouldn't be able to hold back his laughter, of all the guys hitting on Jo she would have to fancy the gay one.

"Do you know he's into you?" That wasn't what Dean was expecting, the cloth in his hand currently cleaning the bar stuttered to a halt.

"What? No he ain't!" Dean was dumbfounded, where would Jo get the idea that Castiel liked him?

"Seriously Dean, are you blind? He comes in her every Friday night, only gets a drink when you are at the bar, then he sits and just stares at you; I have seen him checkin' out your ass a few times too! His brother's always pointing out people for him, but he only has eyes for you, how can you not see that? Poor guy is smitten." Okay maybe she had a point, Castiel stared at Dean an awful lot, but it was never uncomfortable. Dean wouldn't admit it to Jo but he actually like the attention it was different to teenage girls throwing themselves at him maybe he liked Castiel?

"I doubt it Jo, the guy has money, looks, probably real smart too, so why would he have eyes for a no good bar man trying to break into the music business who also not only lives at his workplace but practically lives off of tips?"

"Whatever helps you sleep at night Dean-o. Mom said you could stay here for free you know; it was your choice to pay rent." Jo stepped across to the bar to greet one of the few customers that had decided to visit the bar that night. Not too long after Dean was stacking fresh bottles on the shelves when Jo passed him by heading out the back of the building, it wasn't time for her break and she definitely wasn't too stressed to work.

"Hey where you going?"

"I got to tinkle Dean, think you can handle the customer for me?"

"What? Why you going out back to-" Dean turned to face the customer currently waiting at the bar, he was greeted by a pair of deep blue eyes and messy dark hair accompanied with a frankly gorgeous smile, but tonight there were no slacks or dress shirt; Castiel was wearing nicely fitting jeans and a half open blue button down neatly hidden under a figure complimenting waist coat. Dean wasn't going to acknowledge the heat that descended to his groin. "Hey Cas. No brother tonight?" Castiel looked good.

"Hello Dean, fortunately Gabriel isn't here I think everyone needs a week off from him."

"Can't argue with you there. So what's with the getup? Got a date tonight cause I gotta say Cas you're looking pretty good, who's the lucky guy?" Dean definitely didn't miss the blush the spread across Castiel's cheeks; he couldn't help himself from flashing a partially flirtatious smile in Castiel's direction, further deepening the blush.

"I uh... No I just wanted to wear this tonight... It's much more comfortable than my work attire."

"Fair enough. What will it be then, the usual?"

"Yes please Dean, thank you."

"No problem Cas." Dean watched as Castiel scanned the bar for a place to sit, although it wasn't busy that night, there were still no empty tables as many of the customers had chosen to sit by themselves. He let out an irritated huff and pulled out a stool from under the bar. Dean placed Castiel's drink down on a mat in front of where his arms were currently crossed; the other man looked up at him and gave a grateful smile before pushing ten dollars towards Dean insisting he kept the change.

It was just Dean's luck that the night Castiel was sitting right in front of him the college kids had all decided to pile into the Roadhouse at once, Jo was still out the back taking a more than acceptably long break so Dean had no chance of talking to Castiel.

He didn't like taking breaks but with the Roadhouse filling up with people and fast, his stress levels were quickly rising, he was craving a smoke and ironically a bit of fresh air. Castiel had long since disappeared from the stool at the bar; offering him a cigarette out the back wasn't going to happen then. Once Dean was sure Jo would be able to cope without him for half an hour he grabbed his jacket and made quickly for the door. The feel of the cold air on his skin was the best thing he had felt all day, the air was clear, no stench of sweat or spilt alcohol; it was pure. Sweat that had been accumulating in his hair line started to cool against his flushed skin adding to the refreshing feeling running through his body.

The silent crackle of the cigarette between his lips was the only sound to break the silence as Dean stood outside the back door; he nerves were getting the better of him tonight as he looked down at his hand to see it shaking. He took another drag on his cigarette and began to sing, the same song as the time he first met Castiel; he felt his nerves slowly dissipate as the words fell from his lips, seeing the panicked man's blue eyes in his mind further calmed him as he sang.

_This is gospel for the fallen ones  
Locked away in permanent slumber..._

Dean's eyes slipped closed as he continued the song, occasionally taking a drag from the quickly burning cigarette not noticing the door quietly open.

Castiel silently listened to Dean's voice in the night air as he sung the lyrics with emotion behind every word, not wanting to interrupt the man in his state of calm that he obviously needed that night. So Castiel opted for leaning against the door frame and listening to the man's voice.

_...Oh, the fear of falling apart  
Oh, the fear, the fear of falling apart..._

By the time the song was over Castiel couldn't hold back his smile. "You have an amazing voice Dean-"

"Holy shit Cas! Don't do that!" Dean held a hand to his chest as he caught his breath after the unexpected shock, he didn't know Castiel had been there listening to the song and he definitely wasn't expecting the man to break the silence afterwards. After seeing Castiel's eye's fly wide and guilt spread across his features Dean spoke again."Sorry man, I didn't know you were there... No one has ever heard that one before... I didn't know anyone would be out here."

"Oh... Dean I am very sorry I didn't mean to impose-"

"No it's fine Cas really, I just didn't hear you come out here tha's all."

"Oh okay then... Would you mind if I joined you?"

"Nah be my guest man." Dean stepped sideways to make room for Castiel against the wall and gestured to the empty space; Castiel quietly thanked him and leaned against the wall not saying anything.

After an extended period of silence Castiel finally spoke up. "Are you okay Dean? You seem a little tense today."

"Uh yeah, it's nothing really..."

"You can tell me Dean... Unless it is private then I fully understand." The small innocent smile that fluttered across Castiel's features pulled at the corners of Dean's mouth.

"Uh well, my band is releasing a new album tonight and I'm pretty nervous the singles did pretty well, better than our last album but if we get this right we can go on tour and I can finally get some cash in my bank maybe move out of the room upstairs." Dean wrapped the back of his neck in his palm as he spoke, focusing all of his attention on the floor in front of him; not wanting Castiel to see the embarrassment on his face...

"Well Dean with a voice like that I don't know why people wouldn't buy the album; I know I would. If you don't mind me asking, why haven't people heard the song you were singing? I should think it would be very popular with your fans no? I thought it was beautiful personally." Castiel's gaze focused solely on Dean's eyes, the truth behind his words shone through.

"I dunno really, I just never had the opportunity to propose it, Sammy writes most of the lyrics I help him sometimes but I've never shown anyone any of my solo pieces... To embarrassed I guess." Dean pursed his lips tight, the song meant a lot to him and if the others didn't like it then it was going to be a huge hit to his ego.

"Well you shouldn't be Dean."

"Thanks Cas." Dean threw away the cigarette butt that had long since burnt out and stretched his arms above his head, turning his head towards Castiel. "So Cas, what'd you come out here for? I hope it wasn't just to compliment my song that I'm too embarrassed to share with the world." Castiel visibly stiffened as Dean's words hit his ears.

"Oh yes... Um well, I did come out here for a reason...I'm sure you have noticed I have been around a lot and I don't think I am all too subtle when it comes to things like this. Well um, I really like you Dean and it's probably really stupid, I am not even sure if you like-"

"Yo Winchester! How long you gunna take on your break?" Jo's raised eyebrows and face of surprise were hanging out of the doorway as she unintentionally interrupted the men.

"I will be five minutes Jo!" Dean all but snapped at her as she raised her hands in a mock surrender and went back inside letting the door close behind her. "Sorry Cas, what were you saying?" Dean turned his attention back to the slightly shorter man

"Oh no, it doesn't matter anyway, it's stupid anyway... I should let you get back to work; I have bothered you enough tonight." Dean panicked as Castiel began to turn away and head back inside the Roadhouse, without thinking he lunged forwards and pulled the shorter man back. Castiel let out a yelp of surprise and looked down at the hand wrapped around his bicep with confusion in his eyes.

"It's not stupid." Dean leaned forwards and pressed his lips softly against Castiel's, the man's blues eyes widened but quickly slipped shut as he melted into the kiss, Dean felt arm's wrap around the back of his neck as a small pleased moan escaped Castiel's lips. He slowly swiped his tongue across Castiel's bottom lip asking permission to deepen the kiss, the shorter man was more than accepting; he parted his lips allowing Dean's tongue to slip into his mouth.

Dean unintentionally backed Castiel up against the Roadhouse as he slowly kissed the man, one hand tightly gripped Castiel's hip, thumb drawing the outline of his waistcoat whilst the other stroked through the man's hair effectively pulling him further into the kiss. Castiel's hands ran over Dean's chest and back whilst short sweet moans escaped his throat. Not wanting to move away from Castiel, Dean leaned his forehead against the smaller man's, deep rushed breathes taken through his mouth as he attempted to refill his starved lungs. "Like I said... It's not stupid." Dean smiled wide as he locked his lips with Castiel's again in a chaste kiss, both men closing their eyes and getting lost in the touch.

"Dean! Seriously, you actually have to work-" Both men whipped their heads to face towards the door; Jo was standing eyes wide and speechless. "Um... Sorry didn't mean to interrupt..." She shot back inside the door swinging closed behind her; both men looked back at each other, lips swollen from the kiss.

"As nice as this is Cas I really do have to get back to work, Ellen doesn't give me the room for free and Jo can't handle the bar by herself all night."

"No it's quite alright Dean, I really must get home, Gabriel will most likely be waiting on my couch and it won't be long before he comes looking for me." Dean felt his heart sink as Castiel mentioned leaving.

"Promise you will come back..?"

"I promise Dean." Castiel pecked his lips before returning to the building giving Dean a smile before crossing the threshold. Dean let out a breath he was unaware he'd been holding as he brushed a hand through his hair.

As soon as he was back at the bar Jo was on him in an instant. "Dean Winchester, I didn't know you had it in you! Didn't know you were into dudes either!" Jo was radiating excitement, Dean really didn't want to deal with her right now, he was still willing away the last of his erection and this conversation wasn't going to help him in anyway.

"Yeah well neither did I until I was seventeen-"

"Seventeen! Why didn't you tell me? That was years ago!"

"To be honest Jo I didn't think you wanted to know I blew a college dude and rode him like my life depended on it at a party but whatever I am always happy to share." Dean grinned as Jo made a gagging noise and attempted to hit him with a towel.

"I didn't need to know that Dean! You are practically my brother; I didn't need to know your sleeping habits!"

"Actually, you asked why I never told you I was bi, because I knew you would ask for details so I was just saving your poor innocent mind." Dean jumped back to avoid the slap from Jo and he giggled as he turned back towards the bar, he actually giggled.

The next morning Dean was awoken by the harsh blaring of his phone on the bed side cabinet, he tried his best to ignore it and drown it out with irritated groans but he had to eventually give in and answer the asshole that woke him up, when he saw it was seven in the morning and Sammy was calling Dean let out a long deep sigh.

"Wha' you want Sammy? I was more than happy in dream land-" Dean looked anywhere but his morning wood, he was _not_ going to acknowledge that whilst on the phone to his brother.

"Dean! Shut up for a second and listen. The album is in the top ten! People fucking loved it!" Dean ignored the head rush as he sat up in complete surprise; the album was in the top ten.

"Holy shit Sammy you sure?"

"You think I didn't triple check?! Dean we've done it, we broke through!"

After the conversation was finished Dean rushed to find his laptop and check for himself, he struggled to catch his breath as he saw that 'Infinity on High' by 'The Impalas' was at number eight on the top selling albums chart. He wanted to tell Castiel, he had been so supportive the night before, he believed in Dean and he had only heard one song, he stopped then; why would he want to tell Castiel? Dean had only really had a few proper conversations with the guy admittedly one did involve kissing; they hardly knew anything about each other.

Dean practically ran down the stairs into the bar, Ellen and Jo were waiting to congratulate him as he leaped through the door, they both hugged him tight as he struggled to string together coherent sentences. "We did it! We actually did it!"

"Sam called this morning honey; we're both so proud of you Dean you definitely earned this. Come 'ere let me hug you again." Ellen pulled Dean into yet another hug as Jo poured celebratory drinks for the three of them.

"So Dean do you think you'll be going on tour?" Dean smiled wide as Jo handed him his drink, he quickly took a large gulp.

"Just can't wait to be rid o' me can you Jo." Dean laughed hard as Jo slapped him on the shoulder. "What about here though? You can't handle the bar by yourselves-"

"Don't you dare think you're staying to help out at the bar boy, if you get the opportunity to go on tour then you go. We are more than capable here, had a girl in asking for work not long ago, don't you worry about us." Dean pulled Ellen into another tight hug, smiling wide into her shoulder. "Thank you so much Ellen, I couldn't have got this far without you."

"Don't you start that Dean, you'll make me cry."

Benny, Zeke and Sam arrived at eight that evening; they were all pleasantly buzzed within an hour meaning Ellen had shooed them upstairs so they couldn't scare off any customers. The four men decided the best way to celebrate their final success was to get thoroughly drunk; Ellen had kindly brought up a couple bottles of spirits for them which were quickly added to the cans of beer untidily piled on the table.

Half an hour later there was a knock at the door and Dean stumbled in the straightest line he could but still managed to knock empty cans over on his trek to the door, when he finally fumbled the door open he was surprised to see Castiel awkwardly shuffling from foot to foot on the other side, he was wearing similar clothes to the those the night before but with different colors; as far as Dean could tell in his drunken haze anyway. He didn't realize he had been staring at the man until he Castiel glanced up to Dean's eyes.

"I am sorry for interrupting you Dean; I wanted to know how the album release went... I can leave if you like-" Castiel was cut off as Dean pulled him close, wrapping his arms around the smaller man's waist and kissing him deeply. Castiel let out a small choked squeak of shock before Dean's hands found the back of his head; he tilted Castiel's head back in order to deepen the kiss further. Dean tried to move Castiel into the apartment but stumbled in his alcohol induced state and dragging Castiel with him; they laid there looking into each others eyes before Dean smiled wide and giggled.

"Top ten Cas." Castiel was impressed Dean even made sense with the amount of alcohol clearly in his system.

"Wait what? Are you serious Dean? That's amazing!"

"I know. Oh, oh come on you gotta meet everyone!" Dean excitedly stumbled to his feet; eventually. He then held out a hand for Castiel to be pulled up with.

"I think you would just fall again Dean, you could barely get yourself up-" Dean huffed but agreed with Castiel, he was struggling to stay upright so pulling Castiel up to his own two feet would have been one hell of a task.

Once Castiel was standing Dean pulled him into the apartment, he objected at first feeling he would get in the way but upon seeing the other three thoroughly drunk men he doubted he would even be noticed so allowed Dean to pull him into the oddly shaped circle around the table of alcohol.

"This is Cas, he's pretty and he's gunna join us." Thankfully the four band members were too drunk to notice the deep blush that covered Castiel's face, well all except Dean. "You're even prettier when you do that Cas." Dean leaned against Castiel and spoke softly into his ear, causing the blush to deepen further. "Can I kiss you again? I like kissing you-" Before Castiel could even think of an answer Dean had their lips pressed against each other, he released what could only be described as pornographic moans alerting the other men of what was happening.

"Yo dudes, get a room! I don't wanna hear my brother's moans!"

"We have one Sammy, you're in it." Castiel quietly laughed as the two brothers exchanged bitch faces. "Just get back to drinking Sammy, I promise I'll be quiet."

"Whatever." Sam turned his back to Dean and continued his conversations with the other men; Dean took that as his moment to continue kissing the unsuspecting Castiel.

They quickly ended up laying on the floor, Dean was stretched across Castiel's torso and legs, feet tangling together as he placed sweet chaste kisses on the other mans lips as he caught his breath, both men smiling wide; Castiel did however stop the kisses when he felt Dean's very prominent erection rubbing against his thigh.

"Dean..."

"Hm?"

"We have to stop, you can't get off in front of you band mates, your brother included..." Dean made an agitated sound before he rolled off of Castiel and sat up; surprisingly the other three men had already passed out meaning Dean and Castiel were the only ones left awake. Dean swayed from side to side as he attempted to get up in the end falling back to the couch in defeat. "I really should go Dean, I have to be at work early tomorrow morning and it's eleven pm now..." Dean groaned as he attempted to get up and convince Castiel to stay. "Sorry Dean, it was very nice meeting everyone but I do have to work."

"You'll come back right?" Dean's eyes were beginning to close but he fought against the sleep as much as he could. Dean hummed in pleasure when Castiel quickly pecked his lips.

"I will see you again soon Dean, try and be sober next time so I can ask you out." Dean nodded eagerly and followed Castiel as best he could without leaving the couch, when the door closed shut Dean fell back with a huff of breath being forced out of him.

"Bye Cas." Dean soon fell asleep, a smile on his face and fond memories he was determined not to forget when he woke the next day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm hoping to have a new chapter up by the 12th April but I can't make any promises as I have exams coming up but I will try my best and this will not be abandoned!
> 
> Comments/ Kudos/ Bookmarks anything encourages me to write more!

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback and/or beta volunteers would be lovely, I am glad you made it to the end and I hope for another (much longer) chapter soon!


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